You’re a pool-playing ninja.
That time you potted thirteen balls in a single shot – stuff of legends. Maybe you did exaggerate a smidge, adding that you were in another room, manipulating the wireless controller using only your mouth while doing a series of black flips – but what a shot. Played for, too.
Now there’s Pool Nation, from CherryPop Games on PlayStation Network. Not only can you pull off the shot of the decade, but you can keep it forever too – play it back at parties, weddings, family gatherings – wherever it feels appropriate.
Wow Aunt Marge with a slow motion replay of your most epic trick-shot; strawberry trifle clinging to her moustache she grins, entranced. The camera tracks your polished balls as they career around the table. Potting one after another, you glance back – not even the trifle can put you off your stride. You’re like a machine.
See the adoring looks on the faces of impressionable small children, as you take on the best of the best in the Pool Nation tour. They’re impressed alright. They wish they were you. Soundly beating the final, toughest opponent, you can almost sense the tears of pride in their eyes as you unlock the final character decal – you’ve collected the lot. Soak up their admiration. You’ve earned it.
Then there’s Dave. He’s eyeing up your cue in a manner that makes you feel funny, and gazing slightly too long at your shiny balls. Then you show him the super-detailed table baize and deforming cushions, and the explosions of chalk dust from the cue tip. He’s hooked.
Challenging him to a game of Endurance, you try explaining that a good streak is what you need to succeed. Dave seems like the kind of man who appreciates a good streak.
Two minutes later, and your record of 18 minutes is safe – Dave’s table is so full of balls it’s groaning under the weight. Not to worry Dave, there’s another eight game modes to go at.
Later, and you’re on your own, playing Speed Pool Online against someone half way around the world on the PlayStation Network. You’ve just beaten him, and in under a minute, too. Another notch on the pool cue. You didn’t have the heart to tell him that last shot you just pulled off – potting the remaining three balls in one epic, Pool Ninja worthy shot – was caused by you lunging forward to save your beloved sandwich from hitting the deck. You couldn’t let that spoil.
You’re a pool playing ninja, baby. A hulking great, trifle dodging, sandwich eating, oxygen breathing, pool playing machine.
And you’ve got the balls to prove it.
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